I think one of the major overwhelming concerns I had on Saturday was that we had nothing for Payten and not only that, but we had no idea what we were going to buy her, which really upset me. She is one who is extremely difficult to buy for and the things that would be beneficial to her, are pretty pricey and we do not have a lot of money, therefore I feel/felt as though she was going to be left with nothing on Christmas and that truly hurt my heart to think about. However, my Father reminded me that Payten will not be the one "hurting", nor will she be bothered by no presents, for she really cares about is whether she feels loved or not and that the person who will feel the hurt and be bothered, will be me. Therefore I need to relax, figure out a few things or figure out one big thing and leave it at that. Payten will be happy with whatever she gets. Heck she would be happy to just receive some wrapping paper and boxes! LOL! So, instead of stressing over something that will only truly affect "me", I need to not worry so much about it and move on, ultimately trying to go with the flow. Thanks Dad, for helping to remind me of this, it truly helped to put things in proper perspective and it gave me a more cheerful disposition. Now, after thinking about it, we might be getting Payten an IPAD. The reason being, is that it can be very beneficial for therapeutic purposes and when she is not using it, the kids and family can use it too, so it will be a win, win for everyone. However, we are still uncertain that we will be doing this, it is just an idea that we are throwing around. In order to do this, we would most likely use some of the funds that we have set aside for Payten, that is set aside to be used for therapeutic and other needs that Payten may have, which will definitely make this present more budget friendly for us, but who knows we might do something else, we will see.
As for teacher, therapist, Doctor, neighbor, etc. gifts, I am going to try and keep them super simple, by doing a homemade ornament. Something along the lines of one of these,
Aren't they so cute? And with it, I thought that a homemade card and with a personalized note in it would be the prefect touch to go with these adorable ornaments. Here is what I am thinking of doing for the card,
That way, it is a gift that is more from the kids and not from Mom. Besides, I think there is something special about receiving a keepsake gift, that has a personal note of appreciation, it screams thoughtfulness and love, which is the whole purpose behind making and giving these gifts in the first place, right?! So that is what I am doing! Honestly, I think that by finally having a game plan on what I am going to do for these different gifts, as well as some ideas for Payten, has helped me to not be so stressed and better able to change my attitude to one that is happy! So, Thank you pinterest and the sweet bloggers and crafters, who post their creative ideas on that awesome site, for if it were not for you, I would not have any clue what to do in regards to these gifts. Now you know what the kids and I will be doing the rest of the week, working on these projects. Then, it will be on to baking! Which most likely will not begin until sometime next week! Seriously, I can't wait! I am finally starting to get excited and giddy over all of this fun craftiness! Not only did pinterest and the people who post their ideas on there, help me with the "thank you" Christmas gifts, but it also gave me some cute ideas on what to do for a "homemade" gift exchange that my friend is hosting on Monday, which has been something else that I have been fretting about, but thankfully now that I have some ideas, I am no longer fretting about it, rather I am excited for it!
I guess you could say, I am that person, that as long as I have a plan and I am working towards accomplishing that plan, things are okay, even if it does not turn out the way I want it to, because ultimately, I know I tried. Therefore I need to keep this in mind through every aspect of my life, so that I can prevent many of these moments from happening! Hey at least I can say that I am learning from all these moments of stress and breakdowns and that maybe by figuring this out now, next year will be free of chaos and stress and replaced with joyful, laughter filled Christmas cheer! I think it's possible. Well, maybe not, but one can hope and dream!
Tonight, was not the only part of my day that was good, overall today was a good day. Payten is still having some troubles, things that we still can not fully put our fingers on as to what is exactly wrong/going on. She is still sleeping her days away and it is now affecting her therapies. She just can not seem to stay awake long enough to function, therefore her therapy sessions are non effective. We are to the point that we might have move all of her therapy sessions to early morning, so that the therapist can catch her during that small window of opportunity she seems to have shortly after she wakes up. This will add more stress on me, but I will take that added stress, if it means more success for Payten. I have a lot to think about in the next few days. Here is a video of Payten at PT. Today Payten had a better session than last week, but still she only gave the PT about five "good" minutes and the rest of the time she slept. Her sessions are suppose to be an hour long, but Payten typically can only give about five to ten minutes, then after that, she is completely exhausted and falling asleep. It breaks my heart to watch her struggle like she is. This video I am about to show you, is shortly after Payten fell asleep, but taken while she is still in the light gait trainer. This video is going to show you just how "out of it" she really has been and will help you to understand why it upsets me so badly. Here it is,
I know it is an extremely short video, but it still gives you the idea of what Payten has been going through or rather what she has been doing, which is not much. Also we feel that more often than not, when Payten is awake, all she does is cry, which is not like Payten. Payten is one the most happiest children you will ever meet, therefore when she cries, we know their is a legitimate reason as to why she is crying. Which is extremely difficult for us, because she can not tell us what that reason is. We are hoping that soon these issues she is having will fade away and that we will start to see Payten progress again. We are waiting for another sleep study to be done, just to make sure she does not need the ventilator again. Also, she has a Doctors appointment tomorrow, in which I hope the Doctor will be able to give me some clarification as to what is going on, why it is happening and how we can help prevent it from happening. I know, wishful thinking! Again, like I always say, Please continue to pray for our sweet Payten, for she is still in great need of those prayers. I want to Thank you all so much, we truly appreciate you praying for our daughter.
Now before I go, here is a glimpse as to what Buddy the Elf has been up to,
Above is a picture of Buddy and Josie, in which they decided to make a carousel and pretend to take a ride on it. In which, Emmett took literally, meaning he turned on the fan, so that they could experience the full effect of what a carousel ride can offer. By doing so, he left Buddy and Josie, in quite an injured state, to the point that the next night,
They relaxed with their family, all while reading books! Silly Elves!
Silly or not, the kids still love these Elves! Which is why I do what I do with them!
Also, it is such fun!
Tis the season to be jolly and I hope this post finds you all feeling a little jolly and that you all have a blessed night, filled with sweet dreams! Much love to you and your families! Good night and God bless.
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