Juggling this great balancing act, called life, is sometimes hard.

As Mother's we are required to be so many things, we fix the problems our kids are facing, we mend their boo boos and nurse them back to health when they are sick, we cook and clean and help with homework, we are the family taxi, and the list goes on and on, and yet we still seem to do it and with no super powers! With everything we do on a daily basis, it is a wonder we still find time to breath, let a lone take a shower or comb our hair. It truly can become overwhelming with all the tasks that lay before us, yet we still keep going, never failing, enduring til the job is done or until everyone is in bed, then we sit back, try to relax and put off what we didn't finish til the following day or at least try to put it off. It is a never ending cycle, with extra things added in along the way in most cases.

You could say Mother's are the best jugglers around, for we juggle this great balancing act called life and for me I am still trying to master this juggling act. I don't know about all of you, but I still drop a few balls now and then! When it was just Zachary and Makenna,  I got the juggling down pretty well, until Payten threw me for a loop and since then, I have felt like I am being pulled in so many different directions, my head is left spinning. There is so much attention and demands that come with parenting Payten, yet I still have three other kids who yearn and demand my attention, as well as a husband who wants alone time, on top of all the other things I mentioned above. It is very easy to become overwhelmed and either give up or try out the role of SUPER WOMAN, (which I tired the look out and it was fun, cute and dandy an all, but I look better as me!)

 Seriously, it took me many years to learn that I am better at playing me, than trying to be a Super Hero Mom! I finally realized I can't do it all, all the time, but as long as I do my best being ME, I am doing good and that is all I need to do/be. But I still struggle with the Mommy guilt, I feel like I should be able to do it all and I can't! The saying goes through my head often, God doesn't give you more than you can handle and therefore I feel like I should be able to do everything Payten needs, plus keep the house immaculate, plus have a sit down dinner every night, and be able to spend quality time with each and everyone of my kids, as well as my husband, every single day! Let's be real here, no one can do this!  Some days, however are amazing days where I do possess super powers and I find that  I can accomplish all those things, but most days, it just doesn't happen and I have come to learn, that is okay.

I have found that Saturdays are a good day to take the time needed to give one on one attention to the different people who are so desperately seeking Mom's attention. I have found by taking turns on Saturdays, with one person, going out to do something of their choice that is fun and then going with Mom to do much needed errands, such as grocery shopping, it has been successful with feeling like my family is getting the quality time they need with Mom and Mom is still able to get much needed Saturday stuff done. It has become a win, win situation for the entire family.

Saturday has become a day we all look forward to. By setting this time up on the weekend, it has helped free up time during the week for me to spend focusing on Payten and helping her with her therapy goals, as well as meeting all her medical needs, with time left to focus on housework and other Mom list required things and not feel like I am completely neglecting the rest of the clan. Joseph and I take whatever free time we can get together, when we can get it. It is not a lot of time, some days we get more time together, than others.  Sometimes it is him who gets to go out with me on Saturdays and run errands, etc. We also on Fridays try and take a moment to just sit and talk after the kids have gone to bed, maybe enjoy some dessert, watch a little TV, and enjoy one another. No, it is not an official date, but it is still time together and that is all we can do. We also try to spend as much time as we can on Saturday and Sunday together, whether it be cleaning the house together, playing with the kids, watching a movie, folding laundry, again it is not necessarily alone time, but it is still time that we spend together. And then when we get the chance, if we can, we try and go out on a date, at least once a month. All of these little changes in our life, have helped me to drop the Super Woman complex and focus on being the real me and learn this balancing act of life, the best way I know how.

Today I got a much needed reprieve with Makenna. This week was torture on my emotions and I needed to get out of the house, so Makenna and I went out with my Mom and we went and got lunch,

had an ice cream cone at Baskin Robins,

 helped Grandma pick out paint samples, walked around Poppy's home décor,

 went over to Wood creations, where we ran into an old friend and while there, bought some chalk paint so we can start painting Makenna's new bedroom set. After that we went Grocery shopping and then came home. No it was not anything grand, but still it was something that I was able to do, outside of the house, that took my mind off of the stress of thinking about Payten and all of her issues right now and allowed me to focused some much needed attention onto Makenna, who so desperately craves my attention. I seriously have not felt as carefree as I did today, in a very long time. I laughed more than I have laughed in awhile, it was so nice and much needed.

After all of our fun out, Makenna and I came home and I was able to spend some time playing with Payten,

who was still struggling and agitated, yet she liked the attention, which made the time we spent together that much more necessary, also she had no accidents or self injury's today, so Yay for that! Zachary, Joseph and I were able to watch a movie together and then Makenna and I ended the night, playing dress up,

 giving pedicures in spa A la MOM!, as well as Manicures and Makeovers,

  all while the boys hung out doing Guy stuff!

 It really was a nice day, in which we didn't worry about making sure Payten did all therapy goals, or focus on much needed house cleaning, rather we just enjoyed each other, which I believe is what the weekend is for, at least in our family, because the rest of it, meaning the house, etc. can wait til during the week sometime. I am so grateful that I have found something that makes me feel less stretched/stressed, with my head spinning in circles and more balanced. Also, since we have started this one on one time each Saturday, my kids have been a lot happier, for they feel like they are important too, not just Payten, which can easily happen, for she does take a lot of Joseph and Mines time. I feel that being able to come up with this idea, was answer to my prayers and I truly feel blessed that I figured out that I can and will master this juggling act called life, for everyone needs balance, right?!